Let’s get intimate. Many people have many different opinions about intimacy, but recently I have discovered a new layer of my own opinion:
My opinion is I’d like to connect with the person I am in love with in hopes of being let into who they are and share who I am, in this extremely intimate exchange of our beings. Kind of a breathy way of saying that I highly value intimacy and think it should mean something.
As a setup for what I want to say….My boyfriend uses English as his 2nd language and, therefore, finds it easier to express himself in Arabic instead of English. This makes him most comfortable because he feels like what he is saying is the truest and most accurate in relation to how he feels.
The reason I bring this up is because instead of our intimacy being peppered with English. I asked him to only speak in Arabic if he wanted to express something! He was hesitant, but agreeable, because he didn’t know what I would get out of him speaking a language I barely understand, and by barely I mean my sentences are on toddler level.. ha
So in this instance I explained to him the layer I mentioned in beginning.
I wanted to understand him and connect with the most honest/true/organic form of him.
Meaning I wanted him to speak and perform in his language, the one that makes him most comfortable and confident to say exactly how he feels and what he means.
Upon this understanding.. I mean everything was amplified. Our intimate life has always been great. I have no complaints, but when I introduced the organics of connection it was kicked up another 8-10 notches! I’m serious. I think I know why..
With him being so comfortable verbally and having no gap between his emotions and words…his physical presentation was just as comfortable, if not more.
I was so into him because I wanted to bridge the gap of language and my only choice was to express myself physically to get my point across and respond to what he was now better able to clearly express physically. Basically, all the miscommunications that come about when using matching languages were diluted, maybe even dissolved because our connection and interaction was 100% emotional and attentive and intuitive and based on connection.
It’s like being blind. All of the other senses weren’t just heightened, but my ability to navigate through the situation adjusted.. so in every sense I was more aware, more carnal, more receptive.. He was more comfortable, more in tune with his emotions, and more in touch with the connection between the things that he says in his head and how it translates to me.
My idea is that if someone doesn’t speak a different language, maybe it’s their culture or their interests that can turn sexual experiences into sexual enchantments. 🙂
Some of my friends have noticed a positive change in their partners performance when they played music that related to their culture…like if your family has a certain type of music that your culture is built around and playing it may let you truly connect.
There are tons of ways to truly connect and I am glad I learned that language makes a difference, so think about all the other things that makes us different, but also draw us to someone. Capitalizing on that and exaggerating it, in a way, could send your intimacy to new heights or at least to another level.
This could go further and not just apply to sexual encounters, but what about day to day. Making people feel understood and comfortable. Embracing the language (music, culture, interests) of someone else in order to amplify the relationship!
The options are endless…
Comments